What Jesus Said About Divorce?

What Did Jesus Say about Divorce?

Matthew 5:31-32 and 19:3-9 are two passages that come to mind. Divorce and remarriage are associated with adultery, except when they occur as a result of sexual immorality, and they should be avoided at all costs among God’s people since he want to reconcile his people.

  1. God’s plan for marriage is for one man and one woman to be together until death separates them.
  2. In the Bible, immorality in one’s sexual relationships is grounds for divorce.
  3. Adultery is defined as divorce or remarriage without biblical justification.
  4. In the Old Testament, the law of divorce was established in order to protect the wife against a wrongful divorce or character assassination.
  5. Even while divorce is permitted in some circumstances, it is never mandated by the law.
  6. If there are biblical grounds for divorce, God’s desire is for reconciliation and restoration wherever possible.
  7. It is necessary for those who have committed the sin of adultery to repent and recommit themselves to God’s standards of sanctity in marriage.
  8. Within the Christian community, Jesus expects divorce to be the exception rather than the rule

The headline instantly drew my attention to the article.″Family lawyer recounts divorce horror stories from 40 years of witnessing the devastation inflicted to children by their fighting parents″ (Carlyle, ″Family Lawyer″) was written in all capital letters.The news included within the article is just as gloomy as the headline suggests.

  • Mary Banham-Hall, a divorce lawyer who has transitioned into a marital mediator, has worked with nearly 3,000 unhappy marriages in her years as an attorney.
  • ″Divorce is worse than death, there’s no doubt about it,″ she says based on her personal experience.
  • Why?
  • ″Death is not something that most people choose″ (ibid.).
  • Banham-Hall is correct in his assessment.
  • Divorce and the dissolution of marriages and families are among the most painful, sorrowful, and heartbreaking situations a person may go through in his or her life.
  • In a poem titled ″The Monster,″ a little girl recounts the effects of divorce in dramatic detail: ″The monster is here, the monster is there, the monster is everywhere.″ Doesn’t it ever think of me when it’s in my milk or my tea?
  • Mom is here, Dad is there, and I’m just not where I’m supposed to be!
  1. The monster is known as divorce, and I say this without any fear of being ostracized.
  2. (The source of this information is uncertain.) Many people would go to any extent to avoid dealing with this issue since it is so tough for them to deal with.
  3. Others dismiss it as inconsequential since we live in a sexually enlightened twenty-first-century Western society, which is incorrect.
  • Jesus, on the other hand, did neither.
  • He did not turn a blind eye to the situation.
  • He also didn’t claim it was a non-issue.

Jesus addresses the issue explicitly in Matthew 5:31-32 and Matthew 19:3-9, which are both included in the New Testament.When these two scriptures are read in conjunction with the other passages of Scripture that address the subject, eight biblical and theological truths about marriage, divorce, and remarriage are revealed.As will become clear, marriage is a wonderful gift from a wonderful God, but it can only function well if we follow his instructions.

God’s Plan for Marriage Is One Man and One Woman until Separated by Death

It is virtually universally acknowledged among Bible-believing Christians that marriage is intended to be a union of two people who will remain together until they are separated by death, which is God’s desire and design.Certainly, this reality is implicit in the creation narrative in Genesis 2:24, but it is made plain by Jesus in Matthew 19:6, when he declares, ″What God has joined together, let no one put asunder.″ Don Carson captures the essence of what Jesus is saying quite well: Matthew 19:3ff is a return to the fundamentals of Christianity.God created one man and one woman in the beginning, and they were joined together as one flesh.

  • In the beginning, the concept of divorce was unthinkable; when God created men and women, there was no provision provided for it…
  • God, on the other hand, despises divorce (Mal.
  • 2:16).
  • (Sermon, number 45)

Sexual Immorality Constitutes Biblical Grounds for Divorce

In almost all cases, Bible-believing Christians agree that God’s desire and design for marriage is for one man and one woman to be linked together until they are separated by death, and that this is the case today.Certainly, this reality is implicit in the creation narrative in Genesis 2:24, but it is made plain by Jesus in Matthew 19:6, when he declares, ″What God has joined together, let no one put apart.″ This is an excellent summary of what Jesus is saying, courtesy of Don Carson.Jesus returns to the fundamentals in Matthew 19:3ff.

  • It all started with the creation of God’s first two beings, who were then united as one.
  • In the beginning, the concept of divorce was unthinkable; when God created men and women, he made no provision for it…
  • Divorce is despised by God (Mal.
  • 2:16).
  • The 45th sermon in the sermon series is entitled

Divorce and Remarriage without Biblical Grounds Constitutes Adultery

When it comes to who he is speaking to in 5:32, Jesus is plain and direct: ″Everyone.″ There are no exceptions to this rule.When it comes to divorce, the sentence ″except in cases of sexual immorality″ specifies the one scenario in which it is allowed in God’s view.Without this exception, all divorce is wicked and leads to sin on the part of the parties.

  • Divorce outside of this exemption, according to Jesus, ″causes her to engage in adultery.″ While speaking about the wife, Jesus implies that the woman will be forced to rely on her husband in order to survive.
  • A woman is compelled to commit adultery because to the lack of biblical grounds for divorce, which she does not want.
  • Furthermore, a man who marries a woman who has been divorced without the approval of the Bible is guilty of the sin of adultery.
  • Our wicked souls are indicted by the fact that there is any doubt about what Christ was trying to say.
  • According to John MacArthur, the various muddled and conflicting beliefs regarding biblical teaching on divorce that exist today are not the result of a deficit in God’s revelation, but rather the result of sin clouding men’s perception of the clear simplicity of what God has taught.
  • (Matthew 1–7, Matthew 307) Remarriage does not constitute adultery in the case of sexual immorality after a previous marriage.
  • As Grant Osborne points out, Jesus is unambiguous when it comes to the divine idea: (Matthew, page 200)

The Old Testament Law on Divorce Was Designed to Protect the Wife from Frivolous Divorce and Character Assassination

The topic of Deuteronomy 24:1-4, which deals with divorce, was dominated by two rabbinic schools by the time of Jesus.According to the Shammai school of thought, the only permitted basis for ending a marriage via divorce was sexual immorality.The Hillel school of thought held that whatever a wife did that caused her husband dissatisfaction was sufficient grounds for divorce.

  • Hillel’s perspective would eventually come to dominate the debate, and Quarles expertly explains how permissive Hillel’s attitude eventually became: By the time of the writing of the Mishnah (about AD 200), the majority of rabbis appear to have agreed with Hillel’s point of view.
  • There are numerous and ludicrous reasons for divorce mentioned in the Mishnah, rendering the vow of marriage completely useless.
  • In accordance with the Mishnah, a man may divorce his wife if she becomes barren (m.
  • Yebam.
  • 6:6; m.
  • Git.
  • 4:8), if she becomes deaf and dumb (m.
  • Yebam.
  1. 14:1), or if she is diagnosed with epilepsy, tetanus, warts, or leprosy.
  2. A man might divorce his wife if she failed to fulfill specific household chores, according to the Mishnah Ketubbot 5:5.
  3. If her husband regarded her to be unproductive, he had the right to divorce her.
  • In addition, according to Rabbinic law, some physical flaws in the woman were considered so offensive that they were considered acceptable grounds for divorce.
  • .
  • .

.As a result, if a woman’s skull is wedge-shaped, turnip-shaped, or hammer-shaped, or if her head is somehow misshapen, such as ″sunk in″ or ″flat at the back,″ a man may be able to divorce his wife.He could divorce his wife if she had bad posture or thinning hair; he could divorce her if she had no eyebrows, just one eyebrow, or bushy eyebrows; he could divorce her if she had no eyebrows, only one eyebrow, or bushy eyebrows.

If she had a pug nose, he might consider divorcing her.She was particularly concerned about the state of her eyes.It didn’t matter if she had eyes that were too high or too low, if she was cross-eyed, if she had m.Git.4:8), or if she had burnt his dinner, it didn’t matter if he just found someone he felt was attractive (m.Git.

9:10).Divorce may also be granted if the other party did not engage in sexual intercourse on a sufficient number of occasions, and the legislation expressly stated reasonable expectations in this respect.In the case of a day worker, the wife was required to please her husband every day; in the case of camel drivers, she had to satisfy her husband every 30 days; and in the case of sailors, she had to satisfy her husband every six months (m.

Ketub.5:6).Quarles’ Sermon (pages 125–27) explains how to be a Christian.We, in our hubris and superiority complex, find such a viewpoint to be amusing in today’s environment.According to our evolved way of thinking, we don’t even require a valid cause to stop a marriage through divorce.

  1. We refer to this as ″no-fault divorce.″ In Matthew 5 and 19, Jesus expresses his strong opposition to the concept of frivolous divorce, which was growing common at the time of his death.
  2. Especially vulnerable is the wife, who must be shielded from such madness.
  3. Weddings are sacred, divine, and ordered institutions, given as a gift by the Almighty to the people of the world.
  4. We are not going to play games with it.

Though Divorce Is Permitted in Specific Circumstances, It Is Never Commanded

The Bible’s teachings on sexual immorality (Matthew 5 and 19) give one authority to divorce one’s spouse.First Corinthians 7:12-16 purports to grant authorization for divorce in the case of a believing spouse who has been abandoned or abandoned by an unbelieving spouse.However, in certain situations, divorce is only permissible, not mandated.

  • From Genesis to Revelation, there is nothing in the Bible that necessitates a divorce.
  • The sole probable exception to this rule is the problematic issue of intermarriage between Israelites and idolatrous pagans in Ezra 9–10, which is a tough matter to resolve.
  • The Bible as a whole, on the other hand, never mentions divorce as a first or preferable alternative.

Even When There Is Biblical Grounds for Divorce, God’s Desire Is for Reconciliation and Restoration if Possible

Not only does God never mandate divorce, but he also wishes for marriages to be healed when they are.Our God is a God who seeks to bring people back together.He would always prefer that the couples in even the most difficult marriage seek reconciliation and restoration rather than abandoning their relationship (see 1 Cor 7:10-11).

  • The possibility of true reconciliation will not always exist in our fallen world.
  • However, this does not take away from the truth that God’s perfect intention and desire is for reconciliation.
  • God takes great pleasure in putting damaged lives back together via the gospel.
  • God takes pleasure in putting shattered marriages and families back together as well, thanks to the gospel.

Those Who Are Guilty of the Sin of Adultery Should Repent and Pursue Anew God’s Standards of Sanctity in Marriage

No one of us has the ability to go back in time and reverse the mistakes we’ve made.Without a doubt, everyone of us would do so right away and modify certain things if we had the opportunity.We, on the other hand, are unable to.

  • We must live in the present and deal with the challenges of life as they arise.
  • Divorce based on non-biblical reasons is considered sin.
  • Sin occurs when a person remarries for any cause other than sexual immorality or the abandonment of a spouse who is not a Christian.
  • Our God, on the other hand, is a loving and forgiving God who forgives acknowledged sins quickly and completely (1 John 1:9).
  • In the words of Quarles, ″The new marriage may be initially, but not permanently, adulterous.″ As a result, remarriage without biblical reasons is immoral, if not adulterous, but the marriage does not remain so″ (wronged and seek to restore the marriage to the greatest extent possible).
  • They should avoid divorcing their present marriages and attempting to remarry their prior husbands instead.
  • In Blomberg’s words, ″a person should begin anew by being true to their existing spouse in order to obey God’s rules″ (Matthew, 111).
  • Christians must do the right thing right now—today and tomorrow—in their relationship with God and in their relationship with their existing partners.
  1. Be a devoted spouse today and in the future, until death separates you from your partner.
  2. Make a daily commitment to loyalty and fidelity for the rest of your life.
  3. Show us today how the gospel may make a difference in a relationship.
  • You should not make excuses for your previous sins and shortcomings.
  • Make a list of your mistakes and confess them, repent of them, and then go on in the grace, forgiveness, and mercy of God, doing what is right for everyone!

Jesus Expects Divorce to Be the Rare Exception and Not the Rule within the Community of Faith

Despite the fact that divorce has become the norm in our culture, it must never become the standard in our churches.The Holy Spirit provides us with an internal capacity to be true and to keep our marital vows that others may not be able to provide.We are a community of new covenant believers who have gained a new heart via the gospel (Jer 31; Ezek 36).

  • As a consequence of our new life in Christ, we have experienced a miraculous manifestation that now characterizes our existence.
  • Moreover, as citizens of Christ’s kingdom, it is the spiritual culmination of our living out the beatitudes (5:3-12) in our daily lives.
  • ″For he who is gentle, and a peacemaker, and poor in heart, and kind, how should he send away his wife?″ remarked the famous patristic preacher John Chrysostom (ca.
  • AD 349–407).
  • 17th Mt.
  • of the Homosexual).
  • Despite the fact that we are repenting sinners who seek our Savior’s forgiveness on a daily basis, we are happy to grant the same forgiveness to our wives.
  • In our marriage, as persons who have been reconciled to God, we are committed to pursuing reconciliation rather than divorce throughout our lives together.
  1. This is the command of our Lord.
  2. This is in accordance with his wishes.
  3. This is what we strive towards on a daily and lifetime basis!
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Conclusion

Marriage is not something out of a fairy tale.It’s a lot of labor.However, it is a good endeavor.

  • When it comes to employment, a husband and wife must agree from the start that ″divorce is not permitted.″ It is not a possibility for us at this time.
  • We shall be loyal and true to our word.
  • We shall maintain our resolve and persevere through the difficult times.
  • This is what our Creator expects of us.
  • ″How could we possibly say no to him in light of everything he has done for us in Christ?″ we wonder.

Reflect and Discuss

  1. God’s connection with his people is described in the Bible as a marriage in the Bible (see Eph 5:25-33
  2. Rev 19:7-9). Can you tell me how this teaching can assist us better grasp Jesus’ teaching in Matthew?
  3. What was the one and only exemption Jesus made in the case of divorce? What was the other exception that Paul made? Why are all of the other explanations insufficient?
  4. In what ways is Jesus’ ban on divorce beneficial to us today?
  5. This chapter examines the several grounds for divorce that existed during the first century. Our society, in terms of its proclivity to divorce, is it more or less similar to that of that context? What is the reason for this or why is it not?
  6. Should one attempt to obtain a divorce as soon as possible after learning a spouse’s sexual immorality?
  7. How can the gospel be demonstrated via a restored marriage if one of the spouses is repentant? What other advantages come with a marriage that has been reconciled?
  8. According to the teachings in this chapter, divorce should not be the norm in a Christian community. What can the church do to assist couples in maintaining their marriages?
  9. When a Christian has divorced and remarried, why would it be bad for him or her to rejoin with his or her first spouse?
  10. Immediately following his lecture on desire, Jesus instructs his followers on how to divorce. What is the relationship between these two?
  11. Place marriage in the context of the Bible’s narrative. What was God’s original intention for marriage? What role has sin had in its transformation? What role does the gospel play in bringing healing to a marriage for Christians? What method will Christ use to entirely restore marriage one day?

What Did Jesus Say about Divorce?

Recently, the Western world has focused its attention on the subject of same-sex marriage, with the issue of divorce receiving less attention.Despite this, Christians and non-Christians alike continue to battle with the decision to divorce as well as the process of considering divorce.This is an area where we require clear direction.

  • Despite the fact that the Bible’s teaching on divorce is extensive, we’ll limit our attention in this brief post to one crucial component of Jesus’ teaching from Mark 10:1–12—the prerequisites for divorcing a spouse.
  • When the Pharisees put Jesus to the test on the contentious matter of divorce, His response centered on the ″one fleshness″ that exists between a married couple (Mark 10:2–9; Matthew 19:5–6).
  • Later, in private, the disciples requested Jesus to elaborate on His response (10:10).
  • When Jesus was alone with the disciples, he would emphasize the most important element of His teaching, as was his usual at the time.
  • He emphasized unequivocally that marriage is to be a long-term commitment between a man and a single woman.
  • To end a relationship and marry someone else is adultery (10:11–12).
  • The permanency of the marriage relationship was declared (and continues to be upheld) by Jesus.
  • However, He also admitted that, because to the depravity of the human heart, the marital connection may be severed in certain situations, and that this was a possibility.
  1. What are the conditions in question?
  2. Because of this, we must resort to Matthew 19:9, which has a ″exception clause″: Except in the case of immorality, I believe that anyone who divorces his wife and marries another woman is guilty of adultery.
  3. ″Immorality″ is the Greek word that Jesus used to describe it, and it is from this word that we derive the current term ″pornography.″ The term ″immorality″ in this poem is derived from the Greek word porneia.
  • Porne is the source of the word ″prostitute.″ In Matthew 19, Jesus might have used the word molxeia, which is a word that is especially associated with adultery, but He used a more general one.
  • In the context of unmarried couples engaging in unlawful sexual intercourse, the term ″porneia″ is sometimes translated as ″fornication.″ The term porneia is frequently used to refer to unlawful sexual conduct among married people, and it is typically translated as ″adultery.″ Pornography is deemed immorality in any situation.
  • For the most part, the Greek term porneia refers to sexual conduct that is immoral, clandestine, and occasionally unnatural in nature.

As a result, some researchers use the term in a broad sense and apply it to things like homosexuality, bestiality, incest, and other similar behaviors.Please remember that no matter how wicked these actions are, Jesus only sanctioned divorce in the case of such transgressions…He did not provide the order.

In the event that you have a spouse who engages in the kind of behavior indicated above, you are not required to separate from that individual.In such marriages, the ultimate objective is always and everywhere reconciliation.Galatians 6:1 says, ″If anybody is caught in any transgression, you who are spiritual, restore such a one in a spirit of gentleness.″ Paul was writing to the Galatians.I’m aware of one example when this is the case.A married guy was away on a work trip when he decided to watch an X-rated channel from the comfort of his hotel room.He just stayed to watch for a minute or two before turning the television off, feeling terrible and humiliated.

When he arrived home from his excursion, he found himself unable to fall asleep.Finally, he came clean to his wife about what he had been up to.His marriage came to an end at that point.

His wife was adamant in her refusal to forgive him for that solitary misstep.She was resolved to get him out of her life as soon as possible.And, for a small period of time, she was able to do this.Please you not misinterpret what I am saying.What the man did in his hotel room was wrong, and I don’t condone it.

  1. But I don’t agree with what his wife did, and neither do you.
  2. Divorce is a human decision, not something dictated by God.
  3. And porneia isn’t a blanket norm that we can put across all immorality in relationships and say, ″Well, that’s what you get when you marry a porn star.″ ″Aha!
  4. That’s right!
  5. You’ve completed your task!
  6. It’s all over now!
  • The next destination on our itinerary is divorce court.″ Again, divorce is permissible in circumstances of porneia; nevertheless, it is not required.
  • A mood of ″How can we work through this terrible rupture in our relationship?″ pervades the process of seeking reconciliation.
  • not ″How am I going to get out of it?″ Allow me to point out that pornography is not an unforgivable sin.
  • To be sure, it is a severe, sad, and emotionally devastating act of disobedience and betrayal on the part of the victim.
  • However, it is not necessary to regard it as though it were unforgivable.
  • In the middle of terrible betrayal, and you fear your marriage is on the verge of dissolution, please consider the difficult work of reconciliation before responding with the kneejerk reaction: ″I’ve got grounds for a divorce, and I’m not stopping until I have it!″ Most of the time, filing those documents will simply result in one heartbreak being replaced by another that is considerably more painful.

Based on Charles R.Swindoll’s book Divorce and Remarriage: According to Jesus, this article was adapted (Plano, Tex: IFL Publishing House, 2013).Charles R.Swindoll, Inc.retains ownership of the copyright.

All intellectual property rights are reserved throughout the world.

About the author

Pastor Chuck Swindoll

For more than 40 years, Pastor Chuck Swindoll has dedicated his life to the accurate, practical teaching and implementation of God’s Word.Chuck has served as the senior pastor-teacher at Stonebriar Community Church in Frisco, Texas, since 1998, but his reach goes well beyond the confines of the church’s walls and into the community.Insight for Living has been a major program in Christian broadcasting since 1979, and it is transmitted all around the world.

  • In his roles as president of Dallas Theological Seminary and as chancellor of the seminary, Chuck has assisted in the preparation and equipping a new generation of ministers.
  • Pastor Chuck Swindoll has written further articles.

What Did Jesus Teach about Divorce and Remarriage?

There are a total of ten articles in the What Did Jesus Teach? series.

What Jesus Said

However, despite the fact that the Mosaic law had laws for divorce, the Old Testament makes it plain that divorce falls short of God’s ideal (Mal.2:16).When asked about divorce and remarriage, Jesus took his audience all the way back to the beginning, reminding them that God created humanity as male and female (Gen.

  • 1:27) and stipulated that the man was to leave his father and mother and be united to his wife (Gen.
  • 2:24) in a one-flesh union before God that people were not to break: ″So they are no longer two but one flesh.″ (Matt.
  • 19:6) Accordingly, ″what God has joined together, let no man separate″ (Matt.
  • 19:4–6; Mark 10:8–9).
  • In their answer, Jesus’ audience makes it apparent that they believed that the Mosaic restrictions had effectively supplanted God’s original objectives at the time of creation.
  • Why else would divorce have been controlled under Mosaic law (Deut.
  • 24:1–4), given the religious atmosphere of the day, in their thinking?
  • Rather than attempting to replace the Creator’s original plan, Jesus asserted that the Mosaic rules were instituted solely to acknowledge the fact of human hardness of heart (Matt.
  1. 19:7–8, Mark 10:5; see also Matt.
  2. 5:31–32).
  3. Marriage, on the other hand, was designed to be a lifelong, loyal connection between a man and a woman.

The Disciples’ Reaction

The first disciples of Jesus, although acknowledging the lofty standard set by Jesus, believe his viewpoint to be unnecessarily restricted, and say, ″If that is the case…it is better not to marry″ (Matt.19:10).

  • When they disagree, Jesus dismisses them and responds that, while a few people may truly be blessed with the gift of celibacy (Matt.
  • 19:11–12), God’s original ideal for marriage continues to hold.
  • The disciples’ response, according to some, demonstrates that Jesus’ standard must have been even stricter than Shammai’s ″divorce on the grounds of adultery″ view; the disciples’ response, according to others, demonstrates that Jesus advocated a ″no divorce once the marriage has been consummated″ position; and 1 However, the reasons presented above are somewhat inconclusive, especially given the fact that the disciples’ reactions were undoubtedly impacted by their surroundings and presuppositions.
  • In common with many of their Jewish contemporaries, Jesus’s followers may have assumed that the standard was a little more lenient—perhaps they even assumed that Jesus’s standard was a little more lenient based on his compassionate treatment of the adulterous woman mentioned in John 7:53–8:11—and as a result, they may have reacted negatively to Jesus’s severe-sounding pronouncement.
  • Another point to note is that, although current Judaism compelled divorce in cases of sexual immorality, the passage appears to indicate that Jesus just tolerated it (thus implying the need to forgive).
  • As a result, the fact that Jesus’ criteria for divorce was higher even than that of the conservative school of Shammai may be a sufficient explanation for the disciples’ shocked reaction to Jesus’ teaching in Matthew 19.2.

The “Exception Clause”

Much debate has concentrated on the one ostensible exemption offered by Jesus, according to which divorce may be acceptable in certain circumstances.Divorce is illegitimate ″save in cases of marital infidelity″ (NIV1984) or ″sexual immorality″ (NIV1989), according to this exemption, which is referenced in both Matthew 5:32 and Matthew 19:9.(ESV; ISV; NKJV; HCSB; TNIV; NIV).

  • Due to the fact that the similar passages in Mark 10:11–12 and Luke 16:18 do not mention the exception, some have speculated that Jesus never truly stated the exception and that Matthew (or someone else) inserted it at a later point in the narrative.
  • The ″exception clause″ would, however, remain a part of inerrant, inspired Scripture and hence authoritative for Christians even if this were to occur (which is highly doubtful).
  • Some of those who believe that Jesus did indeed utter the exception clause attempt to bring the Matthean exception clause into conformity with the absolute statements in Mark, Luke, and Paul by arguing that those passages, rather than Matthew, should be the ultimate point of reference in the interpretation of the gospel of Matthew.
  • Another school of thought is hesitant to subsume the Matthean exception clause too quickly under the absolute statement found in the Gospels of Mark, Luke, and Paul, and argues that both sets of passages should be studied in their own right in order to appreciate Jesus’ teaching on the subject at hand.
  • The episode reported in Matthew 19:3–12 gets its starting point from the Pharisees’ query, ″Is it permissible to divorce one’s wife for any reason?″ The incident is recorded in Matthew 19:3–12.
  • For any and every cause (NIV: ″for any and every reason,″ Matt.
  • 19:3; see also Matthew 5:31).
  • 3 As they have done on other occasions, Jesus’ opponents attempt to draw him into a state of contradiction or else present him with the appearance of being forced to choose between competing positions.
  1. According to Matthew 19:3 (and Mark 10:2), the religious leaders were attempting to force Jesus into a choice between competing theological schools while also placing Jesus in danger with Herod Antipas, much as John the Baptist had suffered for his denunciation of Herod’s illicit union with Herodias, his brother Philip’s wife (see Matt.
  2. 4:12; Matt.
  3. 11:2–3; Matthew 14:3–4; Mark 6:14–29).
  • 4 Marriage was designed to be a lifelong, committed relationship between a man and a woman.
  • As a result, the Pharisees’ inquiry calls into play the differing viewpoints held by the various rabbinic schools in Jesus’ day, as previously established.
  • Based on the premise that Jesus himself pronounced the ″exception clause,″ how does Jesus position himself in relation to or distinguish himself from the rabbinic schools of his day?

Without a doubt, Jesus’ position was far more stringent than that promoted by the Hillel school of thought, which maintained that divorce was acceptable ″for any reason″ (see Matt.19:3).On the surface, Jesus’ stance appears to be much more similar to that of the school of Shammai, which held that genuine divorce (with the potential of remarriage) could only be granted in cases of marital infidelity.

However, as previously mentioned in relation with the disciples’ reaction to Jesus’ teaching, it appears that, in contrast to Shammai, Jesus only authorized divorce in the instance of porneia, but first-century Judaism mandated divorce.5 Furthermore, in a very significant way, Jesus’ response transcends the legalistic squabbles between those two rabbinic schools and gets right to the core of the problem in which they were engaged.The crux of the matter is that Jesus, in good rabbinic style, shifts the Old Testament warrant from one specific passage (Deut.24:1–4) to an earlier set of passages (Gen.1:27; Gen.2:24), and thus relativizes the (chronologically later) reference as merely a concession that in no way mitigates the abiding principle established by the foundational texts.

The actual meaning of marriage is taught to Jesus’ followers by emphasizing on the original design of marriage in God’s plan, as revealed in the book of Genesis.Apart from emphasizing marriage’s permanence as a divine rather than just human institution, he also argues that divorce is fundamentally at conflict with God’s purpose for creating the world in the first place.Marriage and divorce are revolutionary for both men and women (see, for example, Mark 10:11–12), and they should be celebrated.

Despite regulations in the Mosaic law that stipulated equal treatment of men and women in regard to divorce (Lev.20:10–12), a double standard prevailed in Old Testament times, according to which women were required to be faithful to their husbands (or else punishment would result), while the standards for men were significantly more lenient.However, under Jesus’ teachings, the rights of husband and wife were placed on an equal basis.As a result, Jesus taught that the desire for other women that exists in a man’s heart constitutes adultery (Matt.5:28), which means that extramarital encounters are equally immoral for both men and women.

  1. 6
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Competing Views

In light of the foregoing debate, it becomes clear that the definition of the term porneia is critical in comprehending Jesus’ teaching on divorce and remarriage, since this is the phrase that is used to introduce the ″exception clause″ that Jesus spoke.Although there is no general agreement among Bible-believing Christians on the precise definition of porneia, the options made by scholars may readily be categorized into one of three contending viewpoints on the subject.According to the first perspective, porneia refers to adultery or sexual immorality, and the biblical legality of divorce and remarriage for the innocent party of a spouse’s adultery or sexual immorality (″divorce and remarriage″) is upheld.

  • This is the more conservative interpretation.
  • Porneia is understood by the second interpretation to be a reference to some form of sexual offense, such as adultery, but it is held that while Jesus permitted divorce on the grounds of sexual sin, he did not accept remarriage (″divorce, but no remarry″).
  • In a third interpretation of the exception clause, neither divorce nor remarriage are permitted in the present context (″neither divorce nor remarriage″).
  • Porneia, according to these scholars, is a reference to a form of sexual transgression that would have rendered marriage illegal under Jewish civil law if it had occurred.
  • Note that there are several subtleties and variations within each of the three positions discussed above, and that this is true for all three viewpoints discussed above.

Suggested Parameters

As an alternative to advocating for a specific point of view in response to the ideas expressed above, we would like to provide certain guidelines for forming one’s own perspective on Jesus’ teachings on divorce and remarriage.First and foremost, it is critical to recognize that the term porneia refers to a generic phrase for sexual vice.In spite of the fact that context is always important in determining what the word means, porneia is usually understood to refer to sexual sin in its most particular definition.

  • In order to emphasize the argument that a concept of nonsexual ″no fault″ divorce cannot be derived from Jesus’ usage of the word porneia, we bring attention to this fact.
  • Second, given the divine design of the institution of marriage, the teaching of the Old Testament on divorce and remarriage, and the unambiguous portions of Jesus’ teaching on the subject, whatever one’s view of the ″exception clause″ on the subject may be, it must encourage the sacredness of the marriage bond, regardless of one’s point of view on the issue.
  • That is to say, even if one accepts the possibility of divorce and remarriage as a consequence of sexual immorality (such as adultery), as is the predominant position of the modern church, divorce must be regarded as a result of sin and, as a result, as a regretful failure of God’s original design.
  • Because divorce and remarriage are so prevalent in contemporary culture, believers should exercise special caution in ensuring that their respective views are shaped by the biblical text, striving to avoid common errors such as conflating stringency with holiness or permissiveness with grace, among others.
  • Furthermore, in light of the divisions that exist among orthodox Christians on this issue, we encourage everyone to maintain their views on divorce and remarriage with charity and conviction, while being open to honest discourse with those who hold opposing views.
  • Notes:
  1. 35. See Daniel I. Block’s chapter on marriage and family in biblical times, published as part of the edited volume Marriage and Family in the Biblical World (Downers Grove, IL: InterVarsity Press, 2003), which includes the following quotations: ″Marriage and family in ancient Israel.″ The following debate owes a debt of gratitude to this piece of work.
  2. Ibid., 41
  3. Ibid., 47
  4. Ibid., 53–55
  5. Ibid., 66–68
  6. See ibid., 77–78
  7. Ibid., 77–78
  8. Ibid., 77–78

Marriage and Family: Biblical Essentials is written by Andreas Köstenberger and David W.Jones, who are also co-authors of the book.David W.

  • Jones is a professor of Christian ethics at Southeastern Baptist Theological Seminary, as well as the director of the ThM program and the assistant dean for graduate program management at the seminary.
  • Also a prolific writer, Jones is the author of more than a dozen articles that have been published in a variety of academic journals, and she is a frequent guest speaker at Christian events such as churches, ministries, and conferences.
  • He presently resides in the Raleigh, North Carolina, area with his wife and five children, whom he adopted as youngsters.
  • Andreas J.
  • Köstenberger (PhD, Trinity Evangelical Divinity School) is the director of the Center for Biblical Studies at Midwestern Baptist Theological Seminary, as well as a research professor of New Testament and biblical theology.
  • The Journal of the Evangelical Theological Society is edited by him, and he is a prolific author as well as a famous evangelical scholar.
  • He is the creator of Biblical Foundations, a ministry committed to rebuilding the biblical foundations of the home and the church.
  • He has a bachelor’s degree in business administration.
  1. Köstenberger is married to his wife, and they have four children.

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What Jesus Said About Divorce

When Jesus was confronted with a question concerning divorce for any cause (Matthew 19), he referred the Pharisees back to Genesis 2:24 to provide an answer. While Jesus established an exception for the damaged party to remarry when a spouse cheats (19:9), He also provided four reasons why divorce was never God’s purpose in the first place.

Divorce violates the precedent God set for marriage in the beginning.

Originally, remarriage was not only discouraged, but it was also considered to be impossible.God created only one man and one woman in the beginning.When it became conceivable in the future, people who chose to ignore the ″one man for one woman″ precedent encountered difficulties.

  • The end outcome for Abraham, Jacob, David, and Solomon was the same as it is for many people today: turmoil, strife, and misery (Genesis 18:22).
  • Because marriage unites two people into one, divorce creates unspeakable sorrow, like to a rip in one’s body.

Divorce violates God’s command to cleave to one’s spouse.

Divorce is the polar opposite of cleave.Marriages must be based largely on commitment, rather than on romantic sentiments, to be successful.Even while romance is crucial, the cornerstone of marriage is a decision rather than a sensation.

  • Malachi 2:14–16 and Proverbs 2:17 both state that commitment, expressed in the form of a covenant before God, is the glue that binds a marriage together in the face of adversity.
  • ″Therefore, what God hath joined together, let not man disjoint,″ says the Bible (Matthew 19:6).

Divorce violates the design of marriage.

The math of marriage is simple: one man and one woman for the rest of their lives.The commitment made by a man and a woman when they marry is for the rest of their life, including the commitment to be one another’s exclusive sexual companion.God’s plan for marriage is for couples to be monogamous.

  • Remarriage is considered a type of adultery since it brings together persons to whom God has not granted the right to be together in the first instance.
  • If a couple divorces for a cause other than adultery, they are both guilty of adultery if they later marry another person (Matthew 19:9; Luke 16:18).

Divorce violates God’s will in marriage.

″I want out,″ a couple tells their marriage counselor.I’m not pleased with the situation.He’s been treating me badly.

  • ″She’s not bringing me any joy any longer.″ ″What is God’s will in this situation?″ should be the question to ask at all times.
  • God’s intention for every marriage is for it to last as long as both partners live (Romans 7:1–3; cf.
  • Matthew 19:9; 1 Corinthians 7:1).
  • —Allen Webster et al.

What Did Jesus Say about Divorce?

Recently, the Western world has focused its attention on the subject of same-sex marriage, with the issue of divorce receiving less attention.Despite this, Christians and non-Christians alike continue to battle with the decision to divorce as well as the process of considering divorce.This is an area where we require clear direction.

  • Despite the fact that the Bible’s teaching on divorce is extensive, we’ll limit our attention in this brief post to one crucial part of Jesus’ teaching from Mark 10:1–12 – the requirement for divorce.
  • When the Pharisees put Jesus to the test on the contentious matter of divorce, His response centered on the ″one fleshness″ that exists between a married couple (Mark 10:2–9; Matthew 19:5–6).
  • Later, in private, the disciples requested Jesus to elaborate on His response (10:10).
  • When Jesus was alone with the disciples, he would emphasize the most important element of His teaching, as was his usual at the time.
  • He emphasized unequivocally that marriage is to be a long-term commitment between a man and a single woman.
  • To end a relationship and marry someone else is adultery (10:11–12).
  • The permanency of the marriage relationship was declared (and continues to be upheld) by Jesus.
  • However, He also admitted that, because to the depravity of the human heart, the marital connection may be severed in certain situations, and that this was a possibility.
  1. What are the conditions in question?
  2. Because of this, we must resort to Matthew 19:9, which has a ″exception clause″: ″Immorality″ is the Greek word that Jesus used to describe it, and it is from this word that we derive the current term ″pornography.″ The term ″immorality″ in this poem is derived from the Greek word porneia.
  3. Porne is the source of the word ″prostitute.″ In Matthew 19, Jesus might have used the word molxeia, which is a word that is especially associated with adultery, but He used a more general one.
  • In the context of unmarried couples engaging in unlawful sexual intercourse, the term ″porneia″ is sometimes translated as ″fornication.″ The term porneia is frequently used to refer to unlawful sexual conduct among married people, and it is typically translated as ″adultery.″ Pornography is deemed immorality in any situation.
  • For the most part, the Greek term porneia refers to sexual conduct that is immoral, clandestine, and occasionally unnatural in nature.
  • As a result, some researchers use the term in a broad sense and apply it to things like homosexuality, bestiality, incest, and other similar behaviors.

It’s important to remember, however, that no matter how wicked these behaviors are, Jesus only sanctioned divorce in the case of such transgressions.He did not provide the order.In the event that you have a spouse who engages in the kind of behavior indicated above, you are not required to separate from that individual.

In such marriages, the ultimate objective is always and everywhere reconciliation.Galatians 6:1 says, ″If anybody is caught in any transgression, you who are spiritual, restore such a one in a spirit of gentleness.″ Paul was writing to the Galatians.I’m aware of one example when this is the case.A married guy was away on a work trip when he decided to watch an X-rated channel from the comfort of his hotel room.He just stayed to watch for a minute or two before turning the television off, feeling terrible and humiliated.When he arrived home from his excursion, he found himself unable to fall asleep.

Finally, he came clean to his wife about what he had been up to.His marriage came to an end at that point.His wife was adamant in her refusal to forgive him for that solitary misstep.

She was resolved to get him out of her life as soon as possible.And, for a small period of time, she was able to do this.Please you not misinterpret what I am saying.What the man did in his hotel room was wrong, and I don’t condone it.But I don’t agree with what his wife did, and neither do you.

  1. Divorce is a human decision, not something dictated by God.
  2. And porneia isn’t a blanket norm that we can put across all immorality in relationships and say, ″Well, that’s what you get when you marry a porn star.″ ″Aha!
  3. That’s right!
  4. You’ve completed your task!
  5. It’s all over now!
  6. The next destination on our itinerary is divorce court.″ Again, divorce is permissible in circumstances of porneia; nevertheless, it is not required.
  • The aim is reconciliation, which should be approached with the mindset of ″How can we work through this significant rupture in our relationship?″ rather than ″How can I get out of it?″ Allow me to point out that pornography is not an unforgivable sin.
  • To be sure, it is a severe, sad, and emotionally devastating act of disobedience and betrayal on the part of the victim.
  • However, it is not necessary to regard it as though it were unforgivable.
  • In the middle of terrible betrayal, and you fear your marriage is on the verge of dissolution, please consider the difficult work of reconciliation before responding with the kneejerk reaction: ″I’ve got grounds for a divorce, and I’m not stopping until I have it!″ Most of the time, filing those documents will simply result in one heartbreak being replaced by another that is considerably more painful.
  • Photograph courtesy of Pexels/Pixabay
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What did Jesus really say about marriage and divorce?

Despite the fact that many people look to the Bible for advice on moral issues, such as marriage and divorce, Professor Luke Timothy Johnson believes that focusing solely on what is ″permissible″ in the Bible is myopic.Emory University’s Robert W.Woodruff Professor of New Testament and Christian Origins at the Candler School of Theology and a Senior Fellow at the Center for the Study of Law and Religion advises students not to use the text to justify their current political or religious beliefs (CSLR).

  • It should never be a question of ‘what is permitted,’ but rather, and always, ‘what is required of us?’ A recent presentation by Johnson at Emory Law School’s Alonzo L.
  • McDonald Lecture in Christianity and Law series was part of CSLR’s ″When Law and Religion Meet″ lecture series on religion and law.
  • A world-renowned researcher on Christianity and its roots who lived for a decade as a Benedictine monk before marrying and having thirteen children, Johnson is now a grandfather to thirteen grandkids.
  • It is possible to find ″what is demanded of us″ in two chapters of Matthew’s gospel that deal with Jesus’s instructions on marriage and divorce, according to Johnson.
  • These are texts that have garnered ″obsessive attention,″ according to Johnson.
  • ″It was further said, ‘Whoever divorces his wife, unless on the grounds of porneia (sexual immorality), makes her an adulteress; and whoever marries a divorced woman commits adultery,″ Matthew reports Jesus as stating.
  • (Matthew 5:31-32; Mark 5:31-32; Luke 5:31-32.) In the second, the Pharisees confront Jesus with the question: ″Is it permissible for a man to separate from his wife for any reason?″ Because of their ″hardness of heart,″ Jesus responds by citing the sequence of creation recorded in Genesis and concludes that man and woman are not two but one (Mark 10:8), as well as the fact that what God has united humans should not be divided (10:10).
  • (10:9).
  1. ″While the Bible’s pronouncements on divorce do not always accord in every detail, it is clear that Jesus does not approve of divorce,″ Johnson says.
  2. ″Jesus does not approve of divorce,″ he adds.
  3. The Explanation Given by Matthew If you live in a culture where men may divorce their spouses for reasons as ″trivial as burning supper,″ as the House of Hillel did in the first century BC, then Johnson’s statements denouncing divorce can come across as surprising to you.
  • It is also stated in Matthew that the disciples tell Jesus that if a husband and wife are in this circumstance that they should avoid getting married.
  • And Jesus responded, ″Not everyone can receive this message; only those who have been given it can do so.″ In other words, there are eunuchs who were born that way, and there are eunuchs who have been made eunuchs by others—and there are others who choose to spend their lives as eunuchs in order to further the interests of the kingdom of heaven.
  • ″The one who is capable of accepting this should accept it.″ In his book Matthew’s Characterization of Jesus, Johnson argues that it must be interpreted in terms of the symbolism connected with Torah in the formative Judaism that existed at the time of the Gospel.

Starting with Jesus’ virgin birth and proceeding until his betrayal by Judas Iscariot, Matthew’s literary style explains to the reader why certain events took place.According to this perspective, Jesus is the messianic interpreter of the Torah, if not the live embodiment of it.In John’s gospel, Jesus is described as ″the Word made flesh,″ and it is reasonable to assume that in the gospel of Matthew, Jesus is described as ″the Torah made human,″ according to Johnson.

Giving Up on Oneself and One’s Family As a result, when a wealthy young man approaches Jesus for guidance on how to achieve everlasting life, Jesus advises him to follow the six commandments: do not kill, commit adultery, steal, or give false testimony; honor one’s father and mother; and love one’s neighbor as oneself.The guy responds that he has, in fact, lived in this manner, and then inquires as to what he is still lacking in.According to Johnson, when Jesus says, ‘If you want be perfect, go sell all you possess and give it to the poor, and you will have riches in heaven,’ he is unhappy and turns away from Jesus.″There is more to the kingdom than a nice and respectable existence; it requires an entire devotion that may include abandoning everything one owns and believing himself or herself to be.″ Included are one’s home, assets, and family, among other things.So, how does this aim contribute to the preservation of marriage, loyalty, and marital accountability?Johnson advises that we look again at Matthew’s description of divorce, adultery, and ″hardness of heart,″ which prevents man and woman from being one body as God intended them to be.

″By being with someone else, the spouse who is sexually immoral has already severed the links of one flesh,″ says the author.Nevertheless, he claims that ″desire is not the only thing that destabilizes the home.″ ″He who loves his mother, father, son, or daughter more than I do is unworthy of my love,″ I declare.Is this complete and total sacrifice and devotion to Jesus intended for everybody and everyone?

Johnson asserts that this is not the case.″Many people are called, but only a few are selected.The kingdom of heaven has not come in your current state—the requirements are rigorous, and there are dangers.″ Marriage, in this situation, is an everyday diversion from the main event.God’s way of life Perhaps the problem is that we take marriage too seriously, in a ″absolute rather than relative″ manner, according to Johnson.A qualitative divide exists between human social structures and the kingdom of heaven, according to Johnson, since the kingdom has everything to do with the presence of God in the present moment.

  1. ″The ties of marriage are no longer in effect.
  2. During one’s life before God, one should live without sexual activity, be preoccupied with the worship of a living God, and strive to be a eunuch for the kingdom of heaven, like children, by giving up belongings, quitting home, and being celibacy.″ According to Johnson, the effect of this message is to heighten Jesus’ singular authority: ″It transforms Jesus into a rigorous and demanding presence, moving him beyond legal and domestic tranquility and into the dangerous territory of a life utterly committed to God, despite his gentleness and compassion.″ And we humans are left to ″muddle through″ in the best way we know how, according to Johnson.
  3. It has become more difficult for us to comprehend what life with God can be like.
  4. It’s tough to follow the messiah and seek God at the same time.
  5. We go to the stars by wading through muck….
  6. A significant portion of our lives, both individually and collectively, is devoted avoiding being in the proper spot, locating a way station, or being in an inappropriate location.
  • The concept of eternal life was significant back then.
  • It doesn’t really matter what such phrases signify to us.
  • ″It’s a shame, really.″

What did Jesus really say about marriage and divorce?

Despite the fact that many people turn to the Bible for direction on moral issues, such as marriage and divorce, Professor Luke Timothy Johnson believes that focusing solely on what is ″permissible″ in the Bible is short-sighted.Emory University’s Robert W.Woodruff Professor of New Testament and Christian Origins at the Candler School of Theology and a Senior Fellow at the Center for the Study of Law and Religion advises readers not to study the text in order to justify current political or religious beliefs (CSLR).

  • It should never be a question of ‘what is permitted,’ but rather, and always, ‘what is required of us.’″ CSLR’s ″When Law and Religion Meet″ lecture series included Johnson’s recent delivery of the Alonzo L.
  • McDonald Lecture on Christianity & Law at Emory University School of Law.
  • Having spent a decade as a Benedictine monk before marrying, Johnson is now the father of thirteen grandchildren and is a world-renowned scholar on Christianity and its beginnings.
  • Johnson points to two passages in Matthew’s gospel that deal with Jesus’ instructions on marriage and divorce as examples of ″what is demanded of us.″ Johnson describes these passages as having garnered ″obsessive attention.″ In the first, Matthew reports Jesus as saying: ″It was also stated, ‘Whoever divorces his wife, unless on the grounds of porneia (sexual immorality), makes her an adulteress; and whoever marries a divorced woman commits adultery.″ In Matthew 5:31-32, Jesus says, ″I am the Son of Man, and you are the Saviour of the world.″ In the second, the Pharisees confront Jesus with the question: ″Is it permissible for a man to separate from his wife without a justification?″ And Jesus responds by attributing the directive to their ″hardness of heart″ (Mark 10:5) and drawing attention to the sequence of creation given in Genesis, concluding that man and woman are not two but one (10:8), and that what God has combined people should not be divided (10:9).
  • (10:9).
  • ″While the Bible’s words on divorce do not always coincide on every detail, it is clear that Jesus does not approve of divorce,″ Johnson says.
  • ″Jesus does not approve of divorce,″ he adds.
  • Explanation from Matthew If you live in a culture where men may divorce their spouses for reasons as ″trivial as burning supper,″ as the House of Hillel did in the first century BC, then Johnson’s statements criticizing divorce would come off as surprising to some.
  1. It is also stated in Matthew that the disciples tell Jesus that if a husband and wife are in this circumstance then they should avoid marrying.
  2. ″This message can only be accepted by those who have been given it, not by everyone,″ Jesus said.
  3. In other words, there are eunuchs who were born that way, and there are eunuchs who have been made eunuchs by others—and there are others who choose to live their lives as eunuchs in order to advance the kingdom of heaven.
  • Whoever is capable of accepting this should do so.″ To understand Matthew’s portrayal of Jesus, Johnson contends that it must be understood in the context of symbols linked with Torah in the formative Judaism that existed contemporaneously with the Gospel.
  • From Jesus’ virgin birth through his betrayal by Judas, Matthew’s literary style explains to the reader why events occurred one by one.
  • As a result of this view, Jesus is seen as the messianic interpreter of the Torah, if not as a live incarnation of it.

As Johnson points out, ″If Jesus is described in John’s gospel as the Word made flesh, it is reasonable to infer that in Matthew’s gospel, Jesus is described as the Torah made flesh.″ Sacrificing one’s own interests and those of one’s family Accordingly, when a wealthy young man approaches Jesus for guidance on how to earn everlasting life, Jesus advises him to follow six commandments: do not kill, commit adultery, steal, or give false testimony; honor one’s parents; and love one’s neighbor as himself.When the guy responds that he has actually lived in this manner, he asks once again, ″What is it that he is missing?″ According to Johnson, when Jesus says, ‘If you want be perfect, go sell all you own and give it to the poor, and you will have riches in heaven,’ he is saddened and withdraws his attention from Jesus.″There is more to the kingdom than a nice and respectable existence; it requires an undivided devotion that may include abandoning everything one owns and believing himself or herself to be.

A person’s home, belongings, and family are all included in this definition.So, how does this desire contribute to the preservation of marriage, loyalty, and spousal responsibilities.As a result, Johnson advises that we look again at Matthew’s description of divorce, adultery, and ″hardness of heart,″ which prevents man and woman from being one body as God intended.As the saying goes, ″by being with someone else, your spouse who is sexually immoral has already severed your link of one flesh.″ The author points out that ″desire is not the only thing that destabilizes the family.″ It is not worthy of me to be loved by anybody more than I am by my mother, father, son, and daughter.″ Are these acts of total surrender and submission to Jesus intended for everyone?As Johnson points out, this isn’t necessarily the case.″Many are summoned, but only a few are selected.

″ You cannot enter the kingdom of heaven as you are—the requirements are strict, and there are dangers.″ Weddings are a diversion in this circumstance because they are so ordinary.God’s presence in one’s life

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